It’s still just January, so I can still talk about the new year and goals, right? I am learning that I need to take the start of a year slowly. While the first few days of January brings optimism and excitement for what the year may bring, it’s easy to get carried away with it all and have a huge list of goals and aims only for it all to fall by the wayside mid-month. This leaves me feeling disappointed in myself and it’s not particularly the healthiest way to start the year, is it? This year,I have taken it easy, really thinking about what I want to achieve and toned down my expectations a bit. It is quite hard to not want to achieve ALL THE THINGS, but I need to be a bit more realistic about what I will really focus on. For a long time I have said that this is the year I’ll learn to crochet a granny square and get a blanket started, or getting the sewing machine out more, but not this year. This year will be simpler, quieter and slower, hopefully.
Just like the previous couple of years, I’m going to have a word that I’ll keep with me for the next twelve months. It’s funny what a little word can do, it’s not life changing, but it helps put you on the right track. The first year I owned a word, in 2016, I chose COURAGE. I am not the most confident of people, but somehow that word would help give me a little nudge in the right direction, help me put myself forward a little. Last year’s FLOURISH was fine, but there was something about it that wasn’t quite right. I think I wasn’t quite ready for it, I needed something harder, more practical so this year’s FOCUS was decided.
I’m excited with what this word could bring. It feels full of potential. All too often I am distracted and procrastinate (it’s taken me two weeks to write this, ha!) and I need to focus more on tasks. There’s the house that needs quite a bit more love and attention, especially as we’re going to have some work done to it (new kitchen!). There is me to focus on – to continue mindfulness practice, to keep moving more. Then there’s the kiddos and Dave. To focus on them, listen to them better, be more present for them. Arthur starts school this year which means I get two whole days for myself which I am stupidity excited about, but I am also aware of a slight sadness, of a longing of not wanting this current chapter of mine and their life to finish. I love my little days out with Arthur, so there’s going to be focussing on making those days as special as possible too. But mostly, mostly I sometimes feel I am missing what is happening in front of me. I don’t want to wake up one morning when I am old and wonder what had happened to my life. So here’s to a productive and focussed 2018.