Gosh, you are one month old already, how did that happen? Sometimes I feel surprised that we have a baby in the house, everything you do is a surprise to me and there is *so much* to learn about you. The start of every morning feels like the first day with you and yet it feels like a lifetime ago that I was in hospital giving birth (one day I shall write your birth story down but in short it wasn’t the nice calm hippy water birth I had planned, but a fast, slightly panicked experience with amazing midwifes, tea and toast and an overnight stay on my own with you; all rather fun really).
You’re getting bigger every day although you’re only just starting to fit your babygrows and despite being born first, you are smaller than all the other babies in my NCT group. You are also the only girl there! I do hope you become good friends with Harry, Thomas, Timur, George and Quincy, it’s a great little group and the mums are lovely. Other friends you have made so far are Seren and Joseph who are four weeks older than you.
Things you have learnt this month:
- Holding your head up in your own. You are still very wobbly and you won’t be able to hold it up properly for a good few months yet, but it’s lovely to see you working your muscles.
- Talking of muscles, you’re getting really strong. You can push back with your legs well and fight against me while I’m trying to wind you
- Breastfeed. Trying to do this has been super hard and it’s only the last week where we’ve both got the hang of things. We still need to work on that latch, but considering two weeks ago you completely refused my boob and I had to feed you expressed milk from a bottle we’re doing brilliantly if I do say so myself.
- Cry. Oh crikey, can you cry. The first few weeks you were quite colicky which meant many, many hours of uncontrollable crying in the night. We couldn’t comfort you and it broke my heart a bit. You do seem to be getting over that a bit, I hope.
- Smile. Sort of. You are so, so close to smiling at me and your dad and I can’t wait until you do. It’s the thing I am most looking forward to at the moment.
In the past week you have become much more alert when you’re awake. You love staring at Panda when you’re getting changed and you quite enjoy lying on your playmat. You much prefer lying on me or your dad more than anything though. You also love having a bath in the Tummy Tub. You get a little freaked out when your dad flies you around the room.
You’ve got quite a few nicknames already from us:
- Gollum. You were only called this shortly after you were born and only because you were so blue and curled up. I don’t call you this any more as you’re much nicer than Gollum.
- Pumpkin. Your birthday might be a week early, but you’re still our Halloween baby.
- Betsy Boo.
- Half-Elf . This one’s from your dad, he says your ears are a little pointy.
- Awesomo Starchild. Sometimes you are still referred to by your in utero name.
- Little one. This is what I am calling you the most at the moment.
- In writing, your name gets shortened to Bets a lot.
Ian the pet cat is doing an amazing job at completely ignoring you at the moment. He’s being lovely to me and Dad though. He’s staying in the house and hanging around us more often and on a night when you were particularly upset and your dad was stressed, he sat on Dad’s chest and looked after him. At the moment he’s bigger than you and weighs twice as much as you, although the tables will soon change on that very soon I’m sure. This morning Ian did give you a couple of head bumps though which is the first time I have seen him acknowledge you, which is lovely and I hope that the two of you will grow up to be the best of friends. Just promise me you won’t pull on his tail too much.
Before you were born, I was never the maternal type and the idea of having children didn’t occur to me at all until I met your dad. When I was pregnant, I was worried that I wouldn’t know what to do and wasn’t sure how motherly I’d be to you, how much I would love you. When you were born however, I felt something deep inside stir. It’s hard to explain, but since you’ve arrived it’s like you have always been here with me. That first night in hospital I did nothing but stare into your big blue eyes and fall in love with you and I’ve been falling in love with you a little bit more every day . You are beautiful and amazing and you have taken your first step into what I hope is a long and happy life.
From your mother who loves you.